APOLOGIES

Should have called him Dennis the menace

Proper little tinker past and present

Upon his arrival he was my pride and joy

At eighteen months a proper little boy

Adrian darling don’t do that

Stop pulling the tail of the neighbour’s cat

SOWWY MUMMY

At two and a half – a big boy

Out of nappies – just learned how

Inquisitive little hands making a mix

Soap powder, porridge oats, eggs and flour

Had to give him a jolly good shower

Adrian darling don’t do that

Don’t sit on the tortoise

You’ll make him flat

SOWWY MUMMY

School days are here at last

Teacher tells me he’s bad in class

Put a frog in Mrs Rupert’s drawers

Pulled out her books and gave a great roar

Adrian darling don’t do that

Don’t dissect the rabbit

I couldn’t take that

SORRY MUMMY

Old enough now to join the cubs

Leader tells me he’s not quite right

Within five minutes got into a fight

Two black eyes and swelling on his face

You should have seen his former mate

Adrian darling don’t do that

No more tadpoles

I’d rather have a cat

SORRY MA

Interested now in flying machines

Making models in an incoherent dream

Simulated noised from behind his door

Pretending to be the  third world war

Adrian darling don’t do that

Mice can’t fly – didn’t you know that?

SORRY MOTHER!

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